Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Laughter lines on corruption!

Please laugh
I read a story where an American general in the story I read during the Korean war. He was addressing South Korean troops and he was carried away when relating a rather humorous anecdote. He would have spoken for around ten minutes. The Korean interpreter gave a one sentence interpretation and continued his address. Later the general asked his interpreter how he managed to summarize his long story and everyone laughed. The reply was; I simply told the men,” The general has cracked a joke. Everyone please laugh”

Muphy's Ground rules for investigators and cover up for goof ups

a) When you don’t know what you are doing do it neatly
b) Similar cases should always be reproducible. They should all fail the same way.
c) First make your recommendations, then reveal your findings
d) A record of cases is essential. It indicates you have been working
e) To investigate a case best, understand it thoroughly before you conclude
f) In case of doubt, make it convincing
g) Do not believe in miracles, rely on them
h) Team work is essential in an investigation, it allows you to blame someone else
i) No matter what conclusion or recommendation one anticipates, there is always someone willing to fake it
j) No matter what the results of an investigation is, there is always someone eager to misinterpret it
k) No matter what you do just know that the world id divided into people who do things and people who get the credit

Walk the office,
Officer: Doctor I feel I am now healthy I walk to and from the office everyday
Dr: oh that is good keep it up
Officer: Yes until when fuel prices can allow

Windows 2003?Officer: I had you talking about windows
ITO: Yes, we have installed it on your computers
Officer: If they are not burglar proofed they will steal the computers

Take some!Lawyer: I thought this was good joint there are so many flies in your soup. I don’t like all these flies
Chef: Kale Mama; tell me the ones you like and I will remove the rest.

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